This is the story of a worker in a noodle factory. The factory is located in the middle of the island, surrounded by the appartments of the staff. Due to each spaghetto being hand-crafted, the factory conducts 5 million workers, in order to produce enough pasta. This is important, because spaghetti are the most important element.
Because without spaghetti,
the illuminati would come back.
For this reason, I came to work every day, until one day, there were spooky ghosts in the factory killing everybody. However, the people were stupid and walked in, just to immediately get killed. So I just stood before the door, not knowing what to do, when some random guy appeared, who I have never seen before.
I said "You know that this building is haunted, right?"
He said "Yes."
"And you know that they are killing everyone, right?
"Yes"
"Then you shouldn´t enter, as you would get killed"
"Shut up, I´m gonna purify this world from evil, so get out of my way!"
I stept aside as it was obvious that this guy was insane. He walked into the building and shot all the ghosts scraming "THAT´S RIGHT, GET NOSCOPED!!11 GET NOSCOOOPED!!!11", even though he clearly was hardscoping. What a noob.
Anyway, after he was finished, one worker asked him: "Who are you?"
He answered: "My identity doesn´t matter, but yours certainly does! You are secretly a monster who´s head exploded, aren´t ya?"
He then, without waiting for an answer, shot him and all other employees, except me, as I was hiding behind a box of imported pasta. You see, there are two noodle factories on the planet. This one produces spaghetti, the other, bigger one, produces gnocchi. The misformed gnocchi are being transported to this place, to be fed to the workers, in order to prevent malnutrition.
Anyway, after he killed all people, he walked up to the highest floor. I´ve never been there and it is forbidden to enter, but I followed him anyway. There were 4 people in business suits. They asked him: "How did the cleansening go?"
He suddenly shot them.
While bleeding out, one of them said: "WTF? How could you do that? You are one of us! You should only kill the ghosts!"
He responded: "It all went wrong. Time to forget about it and dream sweet dreams."
He then took out a sword and sliced up a wall. It appeared that the wall was fake. Behind it was a small, strange looking room. There was a strange switch there. I said: "WTF, man, don´t do that!" I charged into him, but he pointed his sword into my direction, so I ran into the sword and died.
He then flipped the switch, and the universe got gerrymandered.